Image Courtesy of Todd White

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Snobbery

I can’t believe the words I’m about to type are true.

I AM A BEER SNOB.

I’m not talking drinking a Newcastle, or sipping on a glass of Guiness. I mean developing a habit of “drinking those $9 beers that come with their own cork” kind of snob. The kind with the higher alcohol content. The ones you can only find when you take a trip to your local BevMo. Before I get ahead of myself, I need to make it clear I don’t have a beer problem. Im not on the verge of becoming an alcoholic. I just have a serious taste for good beers. And I have my boyfriend to blame.
I remember the days when my stepmom used to come home and literally crave a cold beer after a long, hot day. I was also underage at the time, and though beer smelled like armpit. Flash forward a few years, when I came to realize:

A – beer is cheaper
B – beer wasn’t so bad after all

I used to be a bud light girl. Nothing tasted better to me than a cold, refreshing bud light. But then I met the boy, who introduced me to the tasty Newcastle. A little heavier than my norm, and it took some getting used to, but then I realized “Lauren likes it!” And then came a few guinesses, which I called dessert beer because it was so thick, sweet and creamy to me – at the time. I was blind to the fact that he knew what he was doing. He was slowly turning his girlfriend into someone who loves a good, pretentious beer. Gone are the days of drinking “yard work beer.” My palette craved the good stuff, the craft beer, the stuffy, snobby, German imports. La Fin Du Monde, Rogue, Lagunitas, Stone Arrogant Bastard. Suddenly the 45 minutes spent at BevMo that used to test my patience became an exciting afternoon activity. What can we try today? Which labels do I like the most? Should I go for something flavored, or stick with a chocolate porter –oh the chocolate porter. With its creamy aftertaste, its hints of actual chocolate. What’s a girl to do!

One night I opened the beer fridge and only saw 2 bottles of Guiness and a Keystone Light, and I actually made a sour face. I popped open the Guiness, filled my frosty glass and took a sip – and it tasted like water. The beer I had once thought was rich and creamy just a few months earlier was now so mundane. It was official. I was a snob.

I will still look at a six pack of Bud and remember fondly the times we had together (and how it was easier on my wallet). And I’m sure there will come a hot, sweaty day where a bud is the only thing to drink, because it’s as close to water as you can get. But nothing makes this girl happier than a beer that requires uncorking. And if I’m going to be a snob about something, beer is the way to go.

photo source

11 comments:

  1. My boyfriend has turned me into a beer snob too! I always thought I hated dark beers and that Guiness was "too thick". Now my favorites are dark stouts and oatmeal porters. If you are ever in Chicago go to Goose Island Brewery-- they have some amazing local choices. I had the BEST beer, a aged bourbon stout, of my entire life there!

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  2. I am a fellow beer snob. I still get down on the cheap stuff too though. Beer+dieting=horrible decisions. Ha!

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  3. haha, I loved this! I am a beer snob, as well... but I still drink the cheap stuff, too! I'll drink a keystone light no problem, but I prefer European brews anyday! ((Although, I believe you are more upper class {read: bigger snob ;) }than me. To me, nothing beats a cold Stella or Smithwicks. That's about as foreign as I go!))
    xoxo

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  4. Have you tried Framboise? Mmmmmm

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  5. TOTALLY WITH YOU ON THIS. I'M A TOTTTTAL BEER SNOB. TOTAL.

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  6. You gotta love big hoppy IPA's...but with that said, Dogfish Head 60-minute IPA is the best beer I've had in years...enjoi :)

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  7. I loved this post! I thought I was the only one! I love driving to the import mart!

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  8. My office mate, mrs.mfc, is becoming a bit of a beet snob as well! She and her husband tried some beer from abroad with a ball rolling around in it to keep it tasting like it was from a tap? It's actually fun to try some new things :) However, a bottle of Miller Lite doesn't stay in my fridge for very long even today.

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  9. Oh you totally ARE a beer snob :-) I live in Seattle and you will get a sideways look for ordering light beer in a bar, especially where i live in greenlake ahha ipa or lager ok, but DEF No on the coors light haha

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  10. I'm a tuna snob. Nothing wrong with being a snob. PERIOD. Enjoy all the yummy beer you can afford girl :) But just know that desperate times call for desperate measures. lol My friend just told me about a beer called Blithering Idiot that has 11% alcohol. Yummy, cheers!

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  11. lol, love this entry! but, the closest i get to being a beer snob is that i used to drink nothing but coors light, and now i drink miller lite and bud light and coors seems bland now. LOL

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