New Girl

If you ever watch television these days, you may have seen the commercial for the new show, New Girl.

(anything in quotes comes from the show description here.)

"JESS DAY is an offbeat and adorable girl in her late 20s who, after a bad breakup, moves in with three single guys. Goofy, positive, vulnerable and honest to a fault, Jess has faith in people, even when she shouldn't. Although she's dorky and awkward, she's comfortable in her own skin. More prone to friendships with women, she's not used to hanging with the boys - especially at home."

I could have written this sh*t

Once upon a time, I broke up with a guy and moved in with 3 boys - complete strangers. Ok, J was actually someone I sort of knew, but I don't think knowing my drink order at my favorite bar constitutes a close friendship. Oh and I may have broke up with my douchebag ex like a year earlier, but you get the point.

"NICK is the most grounded. He had big plans for life, but somewhere along the way, he stopped caring and became a bartender. "

J was a bartender.

Ok that is the only similarity for that one.

"SCHMIDT is a hustling young professional who fancies himself a modern-day Casanova. Though his heart is usually in the right place, he's always scheming ways to climb the social ladder and is driven by an immature and almost obsessive urge to be on "the scene."

This would be A. Or D, to some people.
Although climbing the social ladder is not something he fancies. A true hater of Facebook, he would probably rather stay at home with a good movie and a good drink, before venturing out to be on "the scene"

COACH is a former high school athlete who currently makes his living as a personal trainer. Set in his ways and with a take-it-or-leave-it attitude to dating, Coach is most comfortable when he's in the gym. Though he'll never admit it, Coach's macho athletic exterior is actually a cover for his shyness around women, and he struggles to translate his personal confidence into conversation, preferring to speak in sports metaphors - or not at all.

This would be N.

He is a former high school athlete. He also once had some award winning catch or something in some important football game. He did go to school to be a personal trainer.

But I don't think N is most comfortable in the gym. And I don't think he is terribly shy around women. But I do think he would speak in sports metaphors all day long if he could. Oh, and he is white.

"Rounding out this group is Jess' childhood best friend, CECE, a deadpan, somewhat cynical model who blossomed after outgrowing her promiscuous adolescent years."

Alright, I didn't have any cynical model friends.

As their relationships progress, the five(four) friends come to realize they need each other more than they ever thought they would and end up forming a charmingly dysfunctional family.

Now that part, it's pretty dead on. Although I don't talk to these boys as much as I did when we all lived together, they we're a very important part of my life. One even became my BFF. Some of the best stories of my life are from living in that house.

But bottom line - although I most likely won't watch the show, I'm very flattered they picked Zooey Deschanel to play my character.

Recycle.

Hi friends!

It seems I have been away from my blog as of late.

I wish I could say it was because I have been "ohsobusy" but no. 

I'm unemployed, remember? 

Thankfully, I have finally landed a job, and I start in a month. Couldn't be more excited!

(seriously!)

But, since I have no good blogging material to share (besides the thousands of ideas in my head), I am re-posting what I wrote a year ago today. Because it hits home - then again it would hit home anytime I read it.

So read on.

Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven't thought about it, don't have it on their schedule, didn't know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine. 

I got to thinking one day about all those people on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back. From then on, I've tried to be a little more flexible. 

How many women out there will eat at home because their husband didn't suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed? Does the word 'refrigeration' mean nothing to you? 

How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you watched ' Jeopardy ' on television? 

I cannot count the times I called my sister and said , 'How about going to lunch in a half hour?' She would gas up and stammer, 'I can't. I have clothes on the line. My hair is dirty. I wish I had known yesterday, I had a late breakfast, It looks like rain' And my personal favorite: 'It's Monday.' She died a few years ago. We never did have lunch together. 

Because people cram so much into their lives, we tend to schedule our headaches.. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect! 

We'll go back and visit the grandparents when we get Steve toilet-trained. We'll entertain when we replace the living-room carpet. We'll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college. 

Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of 'I'm going to,' 'I plan on,' and 'Someday, when things are settled down a bit.' 

When anyone calls my 'seize the moment' friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with her for five minutes, and you're ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Rollerblades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord. 

My lips have not touched ice cream in 10 years. I love ice cream. It's just that I might as well apply it directly to my stomach with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process. The other day, I stopped the car and bought a triple-decker. If my car had hit an iceberg on the way home, I would have died happy. 

Now...go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to...not something on your SHOULD DO list. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?

Comfort.

source

There is something to be said about old friends. The one’s who weave in and out of your life like ribbons. You can go months without talking to them, and then suddenly they are back in your life like there was never an absence. They are the ones who know the best of you, the worst of you, and everything in between.

I have a dear friend like that. Best friends in high school, we have been separated over the years not by bad things or choice, just by circumstance. And when we need each other, its like we pop back into each others lives without knowing why.

Despite what is going on in her life, she always has a good piece of advice, or an encouraging word.

I feel like I go through life looking for connections like this with every friend I make, only to realize the important ones have been there all along. Minus the few that have actually become my new old friends I will have for life.

They are just hiding in the sidelines, waiting for the right moment to pop up and cheer you on.

Summer

This weekend, my kindred spirit will be visiting me, and we will be doing this

and this

and this

and then I jump on a plane and land here

(Orange County)

Can’t wait to spend a week with my family!

And some friends 

But I guess I will miss this guy…

Guest Blogger - Scott

Scott and I have known each other going on 15 years. One of the only people I still keep in contact from high school, and Im glad I have. Always funny, has a good head on his shoulders and often has a good thing or two to say. Thats why I enjoy his blog, and am so happy he is "lending" me this post to share. After reading, go visit him at Possibly A.D.D.

You can't win if you don't play

There it is folks, is THE bottom line of bottom lines, courtesy of the California State Lottery. Now you being an astute reader (reading this blog automatically makes you an astute reader) you probably know that this post has nothing to do with playing the lottery, which, for the record, is gambling for the ultra stupid. Seriously you might as well just burn your money, or send it to me. But I digress...In this instance I am referring to, you guessed it, LIFE.

Fear, self doubt, feelings of low self worth, anxiety, lack of self confidence; all of these feelings (notice I said feelings and not emotions) are things most of us struggle with every day, yours truly included.  These limiting thoughts and behaviors, to whatever degree they occur, compel us to half ass it through life or even worse, just to quit "playing" all together. Trust me, I know, I have been there. But that moment when I realized that I was on the bench (stupid sports metaphor continues) and started working on getting back to playing was a great day. Its not an easy journey, some days are magical, some days are a struggle, but that is part of how it works.  Take a step back and start examing some of the roots of where this feeliings of limits come from, analyze them a bit.  Take a hard look in that mirror and know that if you work at them those limits mean nothing.  Each day you play, the better you get, your energy grows and you start putting that positive energy back out into the world.  And you know what?  The world responds.  Push yourself to get in there and start playing the game, whatever that looks like to you.  Your damn right it is scary, sometimes a little, sometimes a lot, and yeah, it is hard work too.  And just like in any game, sometimes you win and sometimes you lose, in fact more often than not, you lose.  But dammit, you are playing the game, and that is what counts

So strap on that helmet and get on the field (I told you the stupid metaphor woudl continue) talk to that girl or guy, eat that piece of raw fish, tell your significant other that the bullshit won't continue, take what you want, pound that beer, stand up for what you believe in and what you need, take that class, express your love!  Damn that feels good, doesn't it?  Now you're playing....keep it up. 

Thank you Scott!

S.

"My idea of superwoman is someone who scrubs her own floors." -Bette Midler

I actually own this shirt.

I bought it for the boyfriend when he dressed up as Clark Kent for Halloween this year, then quickly inherited it back to use as a pajama shirt. I love it, its one of my favorites.

But I need to remember, wearing the shirt or not, I am not superwoman. No matter how hard I try to be.

Im not superfriend.

Im not supersister.

Im not supergirlfriend.

Im not superdaughter.

Im not super employee.

And I need to be ok with it. Which is hard. I like to try and make everyone happy. Sometimes I go above and beyond trying to please everyone, or fit everything into a schedule, only to find my spirit completely worn down. And its not like I don’t enjoy the attempt at being superwoman.

I love seeing my friends.

I love bonding with my sisters.

I love being with my boyfriend (when I get to).

I love spending time with my parents.

I love who I work for.

But in the end, I need to remember that I love me too. And sometimes taking a vacation from these things is much needed. 

Speaking of vacations, the boyfriend and I are in desperate need of one. Even a mini spontaneous one. Things have been crazy in our small little world, and I feel like we've been run ragged and we're going to crash (into each other, thats my fear). If only money grew on trees.

To my friends who read this blog, please don’t think Im trying to disappear! Just don’t take it personal if I somehow work up the ability to say “I cant” in the next few weeks coming up. Don’t worry, Im still here. Ill be back to my superfriend self soon. 

Truth.

A friend leaves a warm bed on a rainy night to dole out two consecutive boxes of Kleenex. Picks up the phone even though there are only a few minutes to spare. Skips Friday night dinner plans to shake up the ultimate “I hate him” martini. A friend brings ice cream.

Sometimes we qualify them: high school friend, college friend, best friend, family friend, work friend, acquaintance. Yet, no matter how you find them, a friend makes the world a much brighter place.

A true friendship will survive disagreements, new jobs, new relationships, family insanity, and moves across the country. It transcends any distance, any timeline, any lifestyle.

True friends are the family we choose.

via How to Be Lovely: The Audrey Hepburn Way of Life

A Whale's Vajayjay

Mmm. San Diego. Drink it in, it always goes down smooth. Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means "a whale's vagina".

You don’t know how many times I’ve heard that one, when I was living downtown. San Diego is, in my opinion, a melting pot of sorts. It seems about 96% of the people living in or around downtown, aren’t actually FROM San Diego (myself included, I’m an OC girl). And everytime some Midwest group of boys in the military would hit on my friends and I, they would no doubt say “How do you like living in the whale’s vagina (snicker, snicker).”

 only in San Diego

But my post isn’t about that. Its about my love for that place, and the year I got to live right smack in downtown.

I decided to move to San Diego after my best friend Kim lived there for about a year, and I needed a change in my life. So I moved into a semi  large, brand new apartment, on top of a grocery store (super convenient). This place had a rooftop pool and a rooftop patio that overlooked the city. Lets just say I was living outside of my means, but oh was it worth it.

Everything is within walking distance. I mean I lived ON TOP of a grocery store. There was a Starbucks 3 blocks away (although that’s common EVERYWHERE). Hundreds of restaurants. Tons of bars. You could see Petco Park from my roof. You know, home to the best baseball team ever, the Padres (ha ha). My friends and I became “regulars” at a local watering hole called “Henry’s Pub” and got access to the VIP line. We thought we were cool (we still do).

The nightlife in San Diego is amazing. Walking down 5^th Street, you are greeted by the hostesses trying to get you to come to their restaurant. And there is quite a selection. Within one block you have an Australian restaurant (which has since closed down. RIP Bondi), mexican food, an Irish Pub, a elite rooftop lounge, a dance club, a cigar bar and if you travel a little ways, you come across the best Italian food around and a bar so close to the airport, they open up their patio roof so you can watch the airplanes fly RIGHT over you. Makes it a little tough to have conversations, but a cool experience regardless.

 Living in San Diego for a year was one of the best things I ever did. Sure my apartment was too expensive, sure I spent too much money going out and drinking, and sure I had to move home because I lost my job and couldn’t afford it anymore. But if I didn’t live there for that year, and I didn’t have the experiences I had, or made the mistakes I made, I would not be the person I am today. San Diego taught me independence, showed me how to be confident, and brought some pretty important people into my life. Its probably the only time I will walk 10 blocks in 4 inch heels, crawl home at 2am alone and not be afraid (stupid), wear size 0 jeans easily, and live in a large apartment with an even larger rent. Its been 2 years since I moved away, and I still get giddy thinking about my time there and the memories I have.

 You stay classy, San Diego.

Just Be.

In this bloggie blog world Ive learned to adore so much, you come across so much good material. And even better, so much inspiration for material of your own. Its funny how you can be thinking about something, and you read someone’s thoughts in their own blog that relate exactly to whats going on in your head.

I pretty much stalk Chelsea Talks Smack for that reason. But, after her post  today, its safe to say Im not the only one who feels this way. Like I said when I gave her my creative outlet award, she has a crazy way of speaking (or typing) exactly whats on your mind. So I thank her today for giving me the inspiration for todays blog...

I want stories. Im one of those people who envisions myself in my old age, sitting in a chaise lounge telling my grown up grandkids "stories." Stories of my youth, why I have a Chinese tattoo on the back of my neck at the age of 65, where I met their grandfather and the day I fell in love with him, the day their mother/father was born. That crazy roadtrip I took or that time I decided to drop everything and go to Europe. Ok those last two are things I see in my future, but you catch my drift.

I'll admit in the past year, Ive felt like I had nothing going on in my life and needed to step it up.  I was getting close to 30 and needed to have something to show for my life. I felt like I had no stories to tell. No college days of drinking and blacking out, no high school first love. Just me, trucking along in life, making ends meet. So I decided to go back to school, make lots of plans with my friends, travel anywhere and everywhere I could. And when this year ended, I realized I was exhausted. From life. From trying to have a life. And then I realized where I was at thisexactmoment. I've got nothing on my plate right now. I love my job and dont needto grow in it. Im taking a couple photography classes next semester but dont feel the need to dive full time back into school right now. I love my boyfriend and the place we are in right now. Im not getting married, having babies, going on vacations, stressing at myworkplace, avoiding family because they are crazy. Im just be-ing. And I dont think Ive ever been more happy.

So looking back at my life so far, I realize that although it hasn't been glamorous, I have stories of my own. Stories Ive built from love and heartache, from good times and from bad. And Ive got plenty more life to live to create small little memories that turn into stories I tell one day. Because the best part about hearing stories from my grownups isn't necessarily how I relate, but the look they get on their face or the glimmer in their eye from reliving that moment all over again, for you. My favorite quote of the minute is "The harder the life, the sweeter the song." Something I'll tell my kids and grandkids when they freak out that life isnt going according to plan. And like my grandma with "this too shall pass" I have a feeling this quote will be my new life motto.

Rain.

Here in So Cal when it rains, every news channel has an update on “Storm Watch 2009!” Its almost pathetic, but not as pathetic as the people who suddenly forget how to drive the second the first raindrop hits their windshield. Ill admit, I drive a little more cautiously as well, but I don’t turn into an idiot. Im sitting here thinking “man my toes are cold” (duh, Im wearing thin flats) while reading things from my friends like V braving the first winter snow in Chicago, my sister waiting for the ice to melt on her windshield in North Carolina, or Dyanee glad she got her errands done yesterday because today its -12 outside in Montana. And yet, I still kinda want to move there.

Today is a slow day at work (when isn’t it for me, I know) but I just cant seem to open up my book and read, I keep staring out the window and daydreaming. Im feeling very grateful for random things. I know, we just celebrated a holiday filled with this sort of thing, but the Christmas music playing on my laptop and the cold nipping at my toes is just getting me in that kind of mood. I started to think of all the random stuff I appreciate that never would be something I would put on a list of things Im thankful for. Mostly they are things that make me happy, even if its just for a moment….

• My BFF/roommate likes to whistle and sing when he is alone, even when Im sure he has had a bad day. I bet he has no idea it always makes me pause and smile
• Kim’s laugh
• My nephews voice when he says “see you later” which sounds more like “see you waiter”
• The fact that The Boy always runs warm, whereas I always  run cold, and how he knows to warm my feet without me even asking
• Also when he kisses the palm of my hand
• When my dad calls me with a dirty joke
• Gatorade after a night of drinking
• A good glass of red wine
• Tomato Soup and Grilled Cheese. Everyone must love this one.

And last but not lease (drumroll please)…the sound of the rain.

Hope everyone is having a good winter! What are your random thoughts of happy?